That's Me In The News

Well, I guess the secret is out when Dirrrty Girl spotted me on her local Channel 3 News. Initially I thought since this thing is in the US, my friends back home won't be any the wiser until things are more concrete.

Unfortunately the cat's out of the bag, I was uncovered by the hag. (Sorry Dirrrty Girl! It had to rhyme!)

(Click Here Or Screen Cap Above To Watch The Newsreel)
(Do Not Proceed Until You Finish Watching)

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Ok, so that was a spoof new reel but you've got agree with me that so friggin' cool right?

Thanks to Dirrrty Girl for sharing this!

So anyway, Dirrrty Girl and I were talking cock over what we would do when we get in the Oval Office.

We would:

• Decree that all American beers and coffee must have taste. If no taste, then can only call it Water-With-Colour.
  
  
• Use the power of FTA to pressure Singapore into unbanning MaLing luncheon meat.
  
  
• Free dim sum for all on the first day of office.
  
  
• Shut down all Panda Express outlets (a pretty lame Ch1nese food chain in US Shopping Mall Food Courts) and open Singapore-style Hawker Centres... er... I hope she meant those cheap and good hawker centres and not the stupid $20-for-a-bowl-of-Yong-Tau-Foo food courts.
  
  
• Allow friends and family to bring MoonCakes (with yolks!) and Bak Kwa through US Customs.

We decided against:

• Deporting Paris Hilton and Britney Spears to Myanmar because those poor people don't deserve another catastrophe.
  
  
• Deporting Paris Hilton and Britney Spears to Japan since, according to Dirrrty Girl, "they like weird shit" but we thought well.... that would be insulting to weird shit.

- Voxeros

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